Sooo it's 10 on Sunday night, I have things I could be doing but I just don't feel like it. It's a bad place to be. I'd much rather post a blog about my year so far at High Point, talk to my friends online, put encouragement on my walls and listen to Chris Tomlin.
Things back at High Point have been really, really great. But they've also been stressful and full of struggles. But I'm learning to depend on God and let that stress and those struggles up to Him . . . and He absolves them. It's not always the easiest lesson to learn, but everyday brings me closer to Him as I purposefully seek Him. I've seen the fruits of this past summer become even more abundant here on campus . . . like my patience, which hasn't become a staple of my attitude yet, but when I pray for it and allow the Holy Spirit to fill me, I have it when I most need it. Things that I realized on Project have waned and I've forgotten them . . . but I've realized them again thanks to God's grace and persistance, and I love second realizations. It brings you back to the right frame of mind, the one that focuses on God's will, not ours. I am so thankful for His patience and His willingness to teach me things over and over again, even when I forget them or place them on the back burner . . .
I've been struggling a lot lately with materialism. It's so easy nowadays to treasure objects of ours (which are really His), obsess over them and depend on them for happiness. I've seen this in my life but especially in the lives of my friends and others. Even more so for me, I've been frustrated with what I do have, and I've been consumed by what I don't . . . but other times I'll be annoyed with the "stuff" in my room that I rarely ever use and feel compelled to chuck it out the window or smash it all. I mean, I can't be alone on this one! Seriously, so many times this week I've wanted to get rid of everything I own except for my computer and toothbrush, chop all my hair off and live in a makeshift tent out on the Greensward. I think humans were meant to live simply . . . otherwise we become spoiled too easily and begin grasping things that aren't eternal and lose hold of those fruits of the Spirit Paul writes about in Galatians.
By the way, tomorrow is my 20th birthday . . . in about twenty minutes I won't be a teenager any more, which is soooooo sweet, since I've pretty much been acting 20 since I was in high school. Aaaand it's gonna be a busy, busy day tomorrow . . . but an amazing one, depending on Him all the way!
". . . because the Spirit of the Lord is everywhere in this world. His Spirit holds it all together and hears every word."
- Wisdom of Solomon 1:7
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